My husband and I are attached to our daughter. I do not think this is a bad thing – in fact, many doctors and child experts encourage parents to form a strong relationship with their children (ever heard of Dr. Sears?) We share our lives, our bed, our food, and my breasts with little Danger, in the hopes of giving her the best start in life. Consequently, our social life has pretty much become a thing of the past, which is NOT a good thing.
One particular “problem” that we have struggled with finding balance with is that of breastfeeding. The rational part of my brain tells me that I am doing the right thing by breastfeeding our daughter. She has been, and will continue to be, a very healthy little girl. I’ve cut my risk of developing breast cancer, and although being diagnosed with breast cancer is most likely an unavoidable future for me, I’m doing all that I can to prevent it. The health benefits for both baby and myself are invaluable, and are so important that there should really be no contest, right?
The selfish part of my brain keeps pointing out the many different times that my husband and I have been left out of plans because of our choice to be present parents. The rational part of my brain always wins out, but when I choose to stick with my child over accepting invitations from friends (on the rare occasion that we are still invited) it is a half-hearted victory.
This shouldn’t be a struggle. I should be ecstatic that I am doing what little I can to influence my child’s health and future. But why does that selfish part of me have to speak up so loudly and so often?
Maybe the solution is to make some new friends. It would be great to add some new faces to our “group” and would definitely help when planning trips or other outings. I would have an ally, someone that understands how much it hurts to feel left out by friends that do not breastfeed.
Do you have another solution to my little predicament? I would LOVE to read your suggestions! Don’t get me wrong: Attachment parenting is great! I just need help figuring it out.