Singled Out

It seems that all good things come in threes these days – long weekends, B2GO free deals, and… children. So just how do you stand your ground and appreciate the one you’ve got while everyone else is multiplying?

For my husband and I, it’s pretty simple. When we got married 4.5 years ago, we had already made the decision to not have any children. Of course our plans, dreams and ambitions changed when our daughter came along. As much as we love our precious little girl, we do not want to pop out any more kids.

Our friends and family members are aiming high, and most say that they want three children! The reasoning? To have playmates for siblings, to get a certain wanted gender, to be pregnant and raise another child from birth again, um, newborns are cute…

When we tell people that our baby-making factories will be closed indefinitely, this draws cries of outrage and protest! “Autumn, you’re being selfish. Danger needs a playmate,” is one of my favorite arguments to combat. Ever heard of friends?! I do not need to deliver another baby for my child to have someone to play with. She is lovely and sweet – why wouldn’t other kids want to play with her?

Another argument that people toss at me is that of only-child syndrome. I guess I can see how a single child can be spoiled rotten, but again, it’s up to us to raise our daughter the way we see fit. We don’t want our daughter to be a whiney, clingy, non-productive adult – so we’re going to teach her to be independent now. The focus of any parent should always be to raise competent and industrious children, whether you have one or one hundred. Of course, having multiple children does not guarantee that any of your children will turn out the way you’ve hoped, but it can mean that none of your children turn out that way. Ever heard of sibling influence?

Look, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with having multiple children. It’s just not what everyone wants. Let’s save our judgments for something more important.


About Classic Mommy | Atlanta Mom Blogger

Atlanta Mom Blogger | Enjoys sweet tea and a good challenge | Dislikes dirty fingernails and whining | Mom to Danger | Wife to Dre | Family Travel Blogger
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One Response to Singled Out

  1. Melanie says:

    I agree 100%. Hubby and I just had this same conversation last night with his dad. His siblings all have multiple children whereas we only have one. We are perfectly happy with our one and don’t plan on having any more. We hear the same arguments you do about our child growing up not having a playmate (HE’S IN SCHOOL, HE HAS LOTS OF FRIENDS!!) or you don’t want him growing up being a spoiled brat. Just because a child grows up an only child does not mean they will be spoiled. As a matter of fact, I know a family with 3 children who are all spoiled rotten to the point that no one wants to be around these rude and ungrateful children. It’s not about the quantity that you have to determine whether or not they will be spoiled, it’s the method of parenting that you choose that makes the child spoiled.
    I loved being pregnant and would love to be so again BUT I don’t want to raise another child. Babies are very sweet and cuddly but also very demanding. I’m at a good place with my 4 year old. I get to sleep longer, have wonderful conversations with him, he can tell me what he needs and it takes 2 minuets to get in the car to go places. Why would I want to start over???

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